How do you stop overthinking everything?

Lewis Howes calls overthinking fear in logic's clothes. The coaches here don't try to out-think it.

Most of them don't try to stop the thoughts either. Regina Gerbeaux writes the story down to its absurd core. Kathy Caprino observes a thought instead of treating it as a command. Matthew Hussey picks one small action that gives him data.

Their answers cover writing, noticing, and acting. If overthinking affects your daily life, talk to a doctor or mental health professional too.

Who you should listen to

Seven coaches, including Matthew Hussey, Lewis Howes, and Kathy Caprino, who trained in therapy. Listen for the method that fits how your mind works.

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  Regina Gerbeaux · Executive coach for operators, chiefs of staff, and execs; first Chief of Staff and COO to Matt Mochary

  Listen for: Fear journaling, and checking the story later.

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  Matthew Hussey · Love life coach, host of the Love Life podcast, and author of the book of the same name

  Listen for: One honest next action that gives you data.

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  Eric Partaker · CEO coach who advised Fortune 50 CEOs at McKinsey and helped build Skype

  Listen for: Using the Five Second Rule to start before you talk yourself out of it.

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  Kathy Caprino · Career, executive, and leadership coach focused on women in business

  Listen for: Observing a thought instead of obeying it.

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  Tessa Romero · Mindset coach and founder of MOMSET, coaching mothers through overwhelm and reactivity

  Listen for: Writing one thought out to slow it down.

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  Eric Nehrlich · Executive coach to tech leaders; former Chief of Staff for Google Search Ads

  Listen for: Catching the spiral sooner instead of never having it.

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  Lewis Howes · High performance business coach and host of The School of Greatness podcast

  Listen for: Twenty minutes of breathing, then the action you're avoiding.

How do coaches stop overthinking?

Regina Gerbeaux

Executive coach for operators, chiefs of staff, and execs; first Chief of Staff and COO to Matt Mochary

First Chief of Staff to Matt Mochary

Why themUseful when you need clear priorities and buy-in without formal authority.

Regina’s advice: Fear journaling: write the story down to its absurd core, then check it later.

“I used to spiral hard, especially as a founder: one ambiguous Slack message and I’d be three layers deep into they hate me, the company is over, I’ll die alone. What actually broke the loop was fear journaling, where I write the story down to its absurd core, then check it later.”

Go deeper with Regina

Matthew Hussey

Love life coach, host of the Love Life podcast, and author of the book of the same name

15 years teaching about love

Why themPractical on everything from a confusing text to whether to stay in a relationship.

Matthew’s advice: Stop chasing certainty and take one honest next action that gives you data.

“When my brain starts sprinting, I stop trying to think my way to certainty and pick one next honest action that gives me data. Overthinking hates movement, so I breathe, do the small thing, and let reality be quieter than imagination.”

Go deeper with Matthew

Eric Partaker

CEO coach who advised Fortune 50 CEOs at McKinsey and helped build Skype

Former McKinsey

Why themGood for founders who have become the bottleneck in their own company.

Eric’s advice: Use the Five Second Rule: count down and physically start before your brain objects.

“I used to let a CEO client say I know that until I banned it, because knowing is worthless until it moves. When I feel myself overthinking, I use Mel Robbins' Five Second Rule: the moment the thought to act shows up, I count 5-4-3-2-1 and physically start before my brain talks me out of it.”

Go deeper with Eric

Kathy Caprino

Career, executive, and leadership coach focused on women in business

Host of the Finding Brave podcast

Why themPractical on feedback, delegation, and building influence at work.

Kathy’s advice: Observe a thought instead of obeying it, and step away or put the swirl on paper.

“I learned in my therapy training that overthinking loses its grip once you stop treating every thought as a command and start observing it as just a thought. I get my best clarity when I step away, take a walk, or put the swirl on paper so I can see the pattern instead of being inside it.”

Go deeper with Kathy

Tessa Romero

Mindset coach and founder of MOMSET, coaching mothers through overwhelm and reactivity

Founder of MOMSET

Why themDirect help for parents dealing with anger and overwhelm.

Tessa’s advice: Slow one thought down by writing it out, so your mind holds it instead of jumping.

“I don't try to stop my thoughts. I slow one of them down long enough to write it out, because journaling forces my mind to hold a single thought for twenty or thirty seconds instead of jumping to the next.”

Go deeper with Tessa

Eric Nehrlich

Executive coach to tech leaders; former Chief of Staff for Google Search Ads

Author of You Have A Choice

Why themGood for leaders who are burning out while more work keeps coming.

Eric’s advice: Redirect it: notice the spiral and bring your attention back, the way meditation teaches.

“I don't try to stop overthinking; I redirect it. Meditation taught me to notice when my mind is spiraling and gently bring my attention back to one thing, the way I'd return to my breath. Overthinking is attention wandering, and the skill is catching it sooner, not never doing it.”

Go deeper with Eric

Lewis Howes

High performance business coach and host of The School of Greatness podcast

NYT bestselling author

Why themGood for questions about finding your strengths and pushing past fear and self-doubt.

Lewis’s advice: Twenty minutes with your breath to lower the volume, then the uncomfortable action you're avoiding.

“Whenever I start spiraling, I sit for 20 minutes with my breath, a cue Jay Shetty shared with me, to lower the emotional volume, then I do the one uncomfortable action I’m avoiding. Overthinking is fear in logic’s clothes, and presence plus action breaks it.”

Go deeper with Lewis

Everyone’s advice at a glance

How to stop overthinking, step by step

1. 1

   Write the thought down. Regina Gerbeaux writes the story down to its absurd core and checks it later. Tessa Romero writes one thought out so her mind holds it for twenty or thirty seconds.

2. 2

   Observe it as a thought. Kathy Caprino stops treating every thought as a command. Eric Nehrlich notices when his mind is spiraling and brings his attention back.

3. 3

   Lower the volume. Lewis Howes sits with his breath for 20 minutes. Kathy Caprino steps away or takes a walk.

4. 4

   Take one small action. Matthew Hussey picks one honest next action that gives him data. Lewis Howes does the uncomfortable thing he's been avoiding.

5. 5

   Start before your brain argues. Eric Partaker uses Mel Robbins' Five Second Rule: he counts 5-4-3-2-1 and physically starts.