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I could pay off my car loan early or invest the cash instead, and I don't know which wins

I could pay off my car loan early or invest the cash instead, and I don't know which wins

Finance
I have a two-year gap on my resume and don't know how to explain it

I have a two-year gap on my resume and don't know how to explain it

Career
My shoulder's been aching for a week but I don't want to lose my lifting streak

My shoulder's been aching for a week but I don't want to lose my lifting streak

Fitness
How can I rapidly test what positioning resonates with my ICP?

How can I rapidly test what positioning resonates with my ICP?

Marketing
My son ignores me the second I ask him to do anything

My son ignores me the second I ask him to do anything

Parenting
I'm giving my sister's wedding speech and everything I write sounds like it's for the guests, not for her

I'm giving my sister's wedding speech and everything I write sounds like it's for the guests, not for her

Relationships

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I'm the only senior on a team full of freshmen and sophomores now. The new coach wants us running twice as much as we used to. I keep asking myself if I should finish out one more season or walk away now

I'm the only senior on a team full of freshmen and sophomores now. The new coach wants us running twice as much as we used to. I keep asking myself if I should finish out one more season or walk away now

I run a small skincare line and a regular customer asked what she should try next. I know the $60 bundle would solve her problem better than the single item she's eyeing. Do I mention it or let her buy the smaller thing and ask again later?

I run a small skincare line and a regular customer asked what she should try next. I know the $60 bundle would solve her problem better than the single item she's eyeing. Do I mention it or let her buy the smaller thing and ask again later?

I've started the same 5am routine four times this year and quit by week two every time. I don't lack the plan, I have the plan taped to my fridge. I lack whatever it is that makes people stick to it

I've started the same 5am routine four times this year and quit by week two every time. I don't lack the plan, I have the plan taped to my fridge. I lack whatever it is that makes people stick to it

I sit down to pray every morning and by the second minute I'm thinking about groceries, an email, anything but the prayer. Then I feel guilty for not being able to focus for five minutes. Is my mind just built this way or can it change?

I sit down to pray every morning and by the second minute I'm thinking about groceries, an email, anything but the prayer. Then I feel guilty for not being able to focus for five minutes. Is my mind just built this way or can it change?

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I freeze up and go blank when I meet new people at networking events.

Top perspectives

Vanessa Van Edwards

Behavioral investigator · Founder of Science of People

CaptivateCuesScience of People

Freezing at a networking event is usually a planning problem, not a personality problem. Your brain just doesn't have a script for the first ten seconds.

Robert Cialdini

Psychology professor, Arizona State · Author of Influence

InfluencePre-SuasionCialdini Institute

Networking freeze usually comes from self-focus, not social failure. Prepare one genuine question and one small piece of value you can offer. That shifts your script from “Will they like me?” to “How can I be useful to this person?”

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Vanessa Van Edwards

Their Delphi, answering in their voice

I freeze up and go blank when I meet new people at networking events.
Freezing is usually a planning problem, not a personality problem. Before the event, write down three openers and three bridge questions, then lower the stakes by practicing on baristas and neighbors first.
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