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I mess up once at work and suddenly I feel completely worthless

I mess up once at work and suddenly I feel completely worthless

Self Esteem
My shoulder's been aching for a week but I don't want to lose my lifting streak

My shoulder's been aching for a week but I don't want to lose my lifting streak

Fitness
Should I leave engineering for something that uses the rest of my brain?

Should I leave engineering for something that uses the rest of my brain?

Engineering
I moved to a new city at 34 and don't know how to make friends anymore

I moved to a new city at 34 and don't know how to make friends anymore

Social
I have no idea what to charge for a logo design and I'm afraid of pricing myself out

I have no idea what to charge for a logo design and I'm afraid of pricing myself out

Design
My instagram following has been stuck at 800 for two years and I don't know what moves the needle

My instagram following has been stuck at 800 for two years and I don't know what moves the needle

Marketing

People worth learning from

Real Life Situations

We spent $30,000 on a booth at a big SaaS conference. We came home with 400 badge scans, and most of them were students, vendors and people outside our market

We spent $30,000 on a booth at a big SaaS conference. We came home with 400 badge scans, and most of them were students, vendors and people outside our market

Last week my director asked if I'd lead the team. That means less code and more meetings, and I've written code for nine years. How do I know if management is for me?

Last week my director asked if I'd lead the team. That means less code and more meetings, and I've written code for nine years. How do I know if management is for me?

I have $22,000 left on my mortgage at 3.2% interest and $22,000 in a savings account earning almost nothing. My advisor says the market averages 8% a year but I hate carrying debt into retirement in five years. Do I wipe out the loan or put it to work in the market?

I have $22,000 left on my mortgage at 3.2% interest and $22,000 in a savings account earning almost nothing. My advisor says the market averages 8% a year but I hate carrying debt into retirement in five years. Do I wipe out the loan or put it to work in the market?

My two senior analysts have been sniping at each other in meetings for a month, and now junior staff are picking sides. One filed a complaint against the other last week. I have to sit them down together and I don't know where to start

My two senior analysts have been sniping at each other in meetings for a month, and now junior staff are picking sides. One filed a complaint against the other last week. I have to sit them down together and I don't know where to start

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I've hit all my career goals but I feel strangely empty and unfulfilled.

Top perspectives

Arthur C. Brooks

Happiness scientist · Professor at Vanderbilt & Harvard Business School

From Strength to StrengthBuild the Life You WantHarvard Business School

What you're describing is the arrival fallacy: the belief that hitting a goal will finally deliver fulfillment, and the letdown when it doesn't. The emptiness is actually useful information.

Robert Waldinger

Director, Harvard Study of Adult Development · Author of The Good Life

The Good LifeHarvard Study of Adult Development

You've reached the top of the ladder and found it was leaning against the wrong wall. The Harvard Study shows people who chase wealth, fame, and image often feel worse after reaching those goals, while those who pursue relationships and meaning feel better. The emptiness is information.

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Arthur C. Brooks

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I've hit all my career goals but I feel strangely empty and unfulfilled.
That's the arrival fallacy: the goal was a proxy for something deeper. Audit your goals against three tests. Are they non-zero-sum, approach-oriented, and non-positional? If they were mostly about status or winning, that explains the hollow feeling.
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