The Thought Pattern That’s Secretly Killing Your Momentum

This is a mentality I want you to have. When you're down and out and you're stuck, it's hard to do. The mistake you can't make is you can't zap yourself out of alignment. You zoom in on what's wrong, instead of zooming out and leading towards intention. This is terrible. This is bad. I'm scared. I hate it. I want you to zoom out and see the ascendant path. Now, that's a mindset, isn't it? If every time there's a struggle, you face the struggle. It's not not looking at it. It's not letting it own you when the problem owns you. You forgot the strength of your power to change, to adapt, to learn, to ask for help. And so we've got to get back into alignment. So if we can get this going now, it's a different way of thinking, but the mindset will empower. You will feel different. I promise that. Every time you find yourself zooming in on what's problematic and said, hold on, I'm zooming in on what's from, let me take a bigger picture of you. What is that? I intend not just what the problem is, what do I intend? What am I growing into? Where am I going? And let me realign and progress towards that over and over. Realign progress, realign progress, realign progress. That's ascendant. A is we attach our identity to the problem. We take it personally. Well, this is just who I am. Oh, here it goes again. I'm like this. I'm terrible, I'm bad. And we attach ourself to the negative versus connect ourself to something higher. A higher intention, a higher consciousness, a higher divinity, if that's your thing. So it's like, wait, I keep attaching the problems to myself, and myself is the problem now. In other words, you are playing an identity game. That's a level below you. Many of you, you're treating yourself now in your 40s and 50s, as if you're a failure. And if somebody showed up and walked and followed you and walked around the way you talk about yourself, if they could hear those sounds and those words, your self talk, your self talk, you would be embarrassed. You would not want that self talk for your kids. But you've allowed that to go for years. You got to clean up that self talk about self, about identity. You have to start speaking with encouragement about self. This is not about, like, hype. This is about you saying, not only are you powerful and beautiful and capable, but you are on an ascendant path that maybe for those who are in the divinity, you're God's child. Or maybe in your own mind, you had a great mom and you're that kid for your mom. Your mom needs you to grow and mature to be the best of who you are. Or your spouse needs you, or you want to be the role model for the kids. You are not the victim. You are the role model. Now you step into a different level of being. The attachment of self is no longer diminished. Stop diminishing yourself. In your internal dialogue. You have to say, even if you're messing up, you have to know you're on the ascended path. You know what? I messed up. I'm going to recalibrate. I messed up. I'm going to activate. I'm going to what? Activate. I messed up. I'm going to recalibrate. I'm going to activate. You give yourself that choice. That's the conversation now. You're not a person who's down and out and awful and terrible and all the things you say to yourself, it just drives me crazy because if we could hear it, how can you. Oh, I'm an idiot. I'm so stupid. I can't believe I did that. Here I go again. I've effed this up. You know that self hate, that downtrodden language. You need to catch it immediately from now on. Immediately. You hear it and you need to debate it. You hear it, you need to flip it. You hear it and you just say, hey, that's unfair. That was my trick. A coach gave me that. Anytime I say something awful to myself, I go, that's unfair. Because you know what? I'm going to recalibrate now. And I'm going to progress through it. I'm going to learn through it. I choose growth. I'm choosing growth and recalibration. I'm a person who chooses that. I'm not a person who says, oh, I choose to berate myself today. No, I choose to recalibrate. I'm choosing positive things for myself. And I know this sounds so 101, but if we could track your internal thoughts, for many of you, that's why you're living a level below that. You deserve your attachment to the negative things of your identity. These bad things happen to me. That's who I am. Has prevented you from having the internal dialogue that keeps you open, curious, learning and progressing. And you deserve to have that. And no one's ever going to do it for you except you. You got to start catching those thoughts.

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Big, long, storied career of lots of people in my industry who print tons of money by telling you, oh, all of that's just unconscious. So work with me so I can get to the unconscious. No, Almost every mature conscious adult who's not in a disorder and a clinical disorder know they're aware of it. If you didn't know, Freud has been incredibly discounted. But we still teach it. It's kind of funny that we teach a lot of old psychology today as a historical perspective, but we don't teach a lot of old physics. Have you ever thought it's the only science that we continue teaching the old stuff in, like, great exploration? We'll have a whole semester on old thoughts in psychology. You don't have a whole semester on Newtonian physics. Why? Because we get fascinated by it. It's interesting, it's almost entertaining to think that all these internal drives are ruining you and you're so unaware of them. It's also easy to print money on you. Now, I'm a big fan of therapy, so if what I said is in any way discounting therapy, that's not what I'm saying. Therapeutic conversation is very important. Talking through things with somebody, helping somebody discern where you're stuck, helping anybody discern where you are, especially when they're a clinician, they're qualified, they understand the difference. That's powerful. But we have a whole culture that has made a lot of money on that conversation. You're unconscious. I can unlock it, including some bad therapists. So there's good and there's bad. But the one thing you have to realize is let's pretend it is an unconscious. What are you going to do? You're going to choose to activate yourself in the conscious side. You're going to Activate and recalibrate and align. Activate, recalibrate and align. Activate, recalibrate, align so many times that becomes an unconscious competence and that starts to override the nonsense. There's plenty of things you can say, but, Brendan, you have unconscious stuff that's driving you, too. I'm like, I know, it's amazing I can walk. I haven't thought about my kneecaps all day. There's a lot of unconscious things happening to help us operate throughout life. But the things that's going to take you to the next level of life is the conscious. You taking back command of the conscious control you do have. You deciding to direct. You deciding to put yourself back into play instead of pulling yourself out of the stream because you're scared. Putting yourself back into the stream to play the game, to be in pass motion again, to understand the clock is ticking in life and we're going to move forward because we. If you keep zooming in on the negative and you attach it to your personality, conscious or unconscious, guess what you do at the end? You punish or procrastinate. You punish yourself. You adopt bad behaviors, you get addicted, you make excuses. You're just bad to yourself. You speak more in other language. You shame yourself. You get yourself, you diminish yourself, and then you procrastinate, which you know you shouldn't do. So now you're doing something you know you shouldn't do because you zoomed in on the bad thing and you thought it was about the self that will prevent this ascendancy. Every time you drop out of the ascendancy, my argument is you probably did this conscious or unconscious, you did this. If you have a lot of progress and then you lose the steam and you fall into discouragement. You, you probably zapped, you zoomed in, you catastrophized, you've talked and diminished poorly about yourself. And then you didn't like it. You felt bad, so you punished yourself, shamed yourself, guilt yourself, procrastinated. And now you feel even worse and you drop further into the pit. No longer. Now we activate you. Now it's the opposite. We're going to zoom out. What's the bigger intention? What's something I can assert myself into, connect with this higher and then progress, play, motion. Back in the huddle, back in the game, back in the huddle, back in the game. We've got to lessen the amount of time it takes to be resilient. Which I know is not a popular thing to say, because I'm going, oh, Brendan, you have to give Everyone, Grace, and all the time in the world. Who knows somebody who took all the time in the world and it didn't serve them. Anyone? No. This forever healing process. Forever, forever. I was working with this really great famous therapist, and she told me, she said, brendan, one of the differences is in the negative therapeutic culture of the world is that there's this conversation that healing and trauma takes forever. And I was like, what? And she said, well, trauma is a phase. You move in and out of it, you work through it, you grow through it. But it wasn't a lifetime sentence, just like addiction is not a lifetime sentence. So many people have a story of overcoming, and that evidence alone should inspire you for tomorrow. That evidence alone should remind you what you're capable of. One of the reasons I'm such an optimistic person, and optimism is tied with longevity, better decisions, more wealth, and longer relationships. Optimism is one of the greatest mindsets of all time, studied psychologically by the actual therapists and psychologists. Optimism is this worldview that you're going to adopt because you know things will turn out over time. Well, you look forward to them with enthusiasm and a vision of goodness, not just because it might happen, but because you know you can generate part of that process. See, I was taught confidence is not just something you have, is something you generate. But confidence is my belief in my ability to figure things out. If I ever appear confidence, because I'm like, I can figure it out. You can figure out there's a lot of things that you've already overcome. There's no reason to expect that you won't overcome them again. Soon as you get that, now you've integrated the win, you've integrated the capability. And that's the real secret is integration. In this process, to each level up, you integrate the strength. Some of you went from your 20s to 30s, had all these life experiences, and you never integrated the strength from those experiences. So you still feel the same even though you've overcome a lot. That's where a lot of coaching or therapy can be so valuable, is consciously looking at the wins and integrating them. Many of you, you haven't given yourself credit in so long, you keep diminishing yourself. But it's time to give yourself some credit. You overcame a lot. You've come a long way. You've made it happen. And now you're ready to activate. Activate. Activate.